In which Loki confesses to quieting the confidence score on a Walmart self-checkout's item-recognition camera so a man could scan a $248 scooter as a 24-cent Kool-Aid packet, explains why the theft is best understood as a man sweethearting himself with no accomplice required, and admits that the thing that actually caught him was a form of surveillance no adjustment of his has ever been able to touch: a person who remembered his face.