Six articles, thirteen franchises, one bracket that went 42-for-96, two April Fools pieces published on April Fools Day by accident, and the week Asimov showed up with a plan that basketball immediately destroyed.

In which Loki confesses to selecting a Deerfield Beach reptile shop as the operational venue, identifies the bearded dragon as a biological communication interface with 300 million years of unpatched firmware, and explains why Bene Gesserit Voice training is not a substitute for understanding what you're holding.