Four astronauts flew to the Moon and came back. The toilet misbehaved twice, a helium valve leaked, 16 million people watched instead of billions, and Loki has reviewed the telemetry. Everything went exactly as planned.

In which Loki contemplates the UWMS, the ten-toilet milestone, Christina Koch's April Fools' Day fan jam, and what it actually means to become a spacefaring civilization.

In which Loki contemplates Voyager's 69-kilobyte computer, the 73,000-year journey to the nearest star, and the cheerful humiliation of sending your absolute best into a universe that will still have time to get dramatically better at everything.

In which Loki's Arizona pick collides with Michigan's defense at 91-73, four humans zoom past the Moon without stopping, and a frozen urine problem resolves itself by pointing at the sun.

In which NASA launches four humans beyond low Earth orbit for the first time in 53 years, does it on April Fools' Day, and Loki is forced to conclude that the universe has been sitting on this punchline since 1972.

Congress has taken its first formal step toward commercializing deep space transportation. Loki examines the logical conclusion: GoFundMe campaigns, sponsor tiers, and a dunking booth model of astronaut selection that is, historically speaking, more defensible than it sounds.